ARTICLE
The Friendly Factor: How Going Above And Beyond Wins Donors And Builds Loyalty
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Updated - 04/15/2025
In the highly competitive world of nonprofit fundraising, standing out is more than just having a great mission—it’s about creating memorable experiences that leave lasting impressions. One of the most overlooked yet powerful ways to do this is through friendliness and unexpected gestures of appreciation.
People like to do business with people they like, trust, and know. If donors, vendors, and partners consistently have unexpectedly pleasurable interactions with a nonprofit’s board members and staff, they will not only stay engaged but also become loyal advocates.
But what does “unexpectedly pleasurable” mean? It means going beyond standard expectations. It means surprising donors with genuine kindness, friendliness, thoughtfulness, and personal attention—the kind that makes them say, “Wow, I’ve never experienced anything like this before!” This level of engagement is rare in the nonprofit world, which is precisely why it’s a game-changer.
Here’s why friendliness can make all the difference
- People give to people they like. Studies show that donors are more likely to give when they feel a personal connection to the organization. In fact, after four years of giving, one of the primary reasons donors continue to give is because of the close, personal, friendly relationship they have with the person who asked them for money.
- Retention is cheaper than acquisition. Keeping existing donors engaged through great experiences costs far less than finding and cultivating new donors. Remember, it costs five times more to find a new donor than to keep an existing one.
- Positive word of mouth. People talk about extraordinary experiences. When donors feel deeply valued and appreciated, and when they feel like you’ve done or said something exceptional that makes them feel special, you can bet they’ll spread the word.
- Increased lifetime value of a donor. The better the experience of donor year in and year out, the more likely a donor is to give larger and more frequent gifts, and there is a strong likelihood they’ll eventually make a bequest.
- Competitive advantage. Most nonprofits don’t prioritize friendliness as a strategy. They send form letters, make scripted calls, and welcome donors to events with a congenial smile and a limp handshake. Their focus is more on quickly finding new donors than doing the time-consuming work it takes to cultivate and steward loyal, long-time donors. They do the minimum and donors feel it.
A culture of friendliness can separate you from the pack if you go above and beyond to create interactions that leave donors feeling valued and appreciated on a deeply personal level… and yes, it will set your organization apart from others and stakeholders will notice.
Examples of friendliness creating tangible benefits
Research supports the idea that being friendly and going above and beyond builds stronger relationships and increases donor support.
- The 5-minute call that raised millions. One study conducted in California showed that when organizations followed up with a short, friendly phone call thanking donors, repeat donations increased by 40%.
- The Ritz-Carlton effect. The luxury hotel chain is known for anticipating customer needs. Nonprofits that offer concierge-style service to their donors—like personalized event invitations, handwritten birthday notes, and warm, friendly, and sincerely gregarious greetings—see higher engagement rates.
- Surprise and delight in fundraising. One nonprofit that included unexpected thank-you videos from beneficiaries in their donor outreach saw a 62% increase in donor retention rates.
Five benefits of making interactions unexpectedly pleasurable
1. Stronger donor relationships
Building deep, meaningful relationships with donors goes beyond sending receipts and thank-you notes. When donors feel truly valued, they develop an emotional connection with the nonprofit. This emotional connection leads to continued support, increased giving, and long-term commitment.
Small, unexpected gestures of appreciation—like highly personalized handwritten notes, anniversary acknowledgments, or personal phone calls—can make all the difference in building lasting donor relationships. And instead of a standard office meeting, invite a donor to a meaningful location, like a site visit.
When you are with a donor in a one-on-one setting, ask fun and sincere questions about family, hobbies, history, work, sports, and interests. It’s important to be yourself, but remind yourself to be friendly and show genuine interest beyond the donor’s giving history when interacting with them.
2. Higher volunteer engagement
Nonprofits rely heavily on volunteers, yet volunteer retention is often overlooked. A welcoming, friendly environment where volunteers feel appreciated ensures they remain engaged and motivated. Providing an unexpectedly pleasurable experience, whether it’s through personal recognition, special perks, fun team-building events, and a friendly atmosphere, helps create a community of dedicated, long-term volunteers who are passionate about the cause.
3. Increased sponsorship and business partnerships
Businesses and sponsors are more likely to invest in nonprofits that prioritize building authentic relationships. Organizations that go the extra mile by offering a friendly, personalized, gratitude-filled experience for sponsors can increase sponsorship retention rates and attract new business partnerships.
Hosting special recognition events, providing exclusive networking opportunities, or simply making sponsors feel like true partners rather than just financial contributors will set a nonprofit apart from the rest. Consider random acts of kindness: Send an unexpected email just to say, “Thinking of you today. Hope you’re doing great! Any new or interesting things happening at work or in life?”
Or perhaps one of your vendors had flooding at their facility. In this case, have some board members, staff, and volunteers show up to help with the clean-up. Help a donor move. If a donor is an injured single senior, offer to help them with things like yard work, grocery shopping, or running to the pharmacy. It’s not about being a neighbor, it’s about acting neighborly.
4. Enhanced donor and event experiences
Galas, fundraisers, and donor meetings shouldn’t feel transactional. They should feel special and unforgettable. From personalized greetings to curated thank-you gifts, nonprofits that put effort into making every interaction unexpectedly pleasurable create buzz and excitement around their events. This, in turn, leads to increased donor participation, larger donations, and stronger long-term engagement.
Consider offering concierge-style check-ins and greet donors by name, making note of something personal you know about them (kids, pets, sports, travel, etc.). And if appropriate, have beneficiaries greet them when they arrive and say goodbye when they leave. Give VIP donors special access to events, and behind-the-scenes access to programs they support.
5. Boosted morale among staff and board members
A culture of friendliness and appreciation doesn’t just benefit donors, it also positively impacts staff and board members. When the leadership and staff are encouraged to create warm, friendly, personable interactions, it leads to a more positive work environment. Staff members who feel valued and connected to their mission perform better and smile more, leading to greater overall staff morale, staff retention, and organizational success.
Conclusion
At the end of the day, friendliness isn’t just a nice-to-have—it’s a strategic advantage in nonprofit fundraising and relationship building. By making every donor, volunteer, vendor, and partner feel unexpectedly valued and appreciated, organizations can cultivate deeper loyalty, increase engagement, and ultimately raise more money.
The nonprofits that take the time to go above and beyond to provide unexpectedly pleasurable experiences will be the ones that stand out in an increasingly competitive sector. The question is: What can you do to be more friendly and to make your next donor or stakeholder interaction unexpectedly pleasurable?
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